Managing Depression

Disclaimer: I am not at all any type of medical or mental health provider. This advice should not be taken over the direction of trained and qualified professionals or in place of medical or mental health care.

Resources 

    I am intimately aware that getting treatment for depression and anxiety can be a difficult. It can be hard to afford or get insurance coverage for therapy. There may also be cultural obstacles to getting help. I grew up in an ethnic household that didn't believe in mood disorders or mental health. I was unable to get help until I turned 18 and was able to pay for my own therapy and psychiatry. Even after getting help, it can be hard to find the right help. It may take some time to find the right therapist or medication that works. I’ve seen 5 therapists and I’ve tried a plethora of antidepressants and mood stabilizers. It took me years to find a therapist that helped me grow and I am still trying out different medications.

    Here are some of the resources I’ve used while in therapy or in-between treatment. Please use these resources, or consider finding some that work for you, if you don’t know where to start in your mental health journey, are unable to get treatment (for whatever reason), or if you need something to help manage your emotions. This list is small but mighty.

• Music: Mantras in Love or anything by Beautiful Chorus 
• This album specifically has helped me through many depressive episodes and panic attacks. 
• Podcasts: Radio Headspace or Sunday Scaries by Headspace
• Apps: Headspace* or Calm 
• Start your seach for a therapist through Psycology Today

Advice

    Depression is cyclical and persistent. Sadness eventually passes, but depression lingers. I’ve dealt with varying degrees of depression since I was about 14 years old. There are things one can do to help alleviate the severity of a depressive episode or help it pass altogether. Here are some of the things I try to force myself to do when I am depressed that help, even if it is only a tiny difference, in no particular order.

Do/Distract: Do anything to distract yourself from your depression. If you have a hobby, turn to that. If you don’t have a hobby, find one. If you have a comfort show, watch that. Talk to a friend, work on a task you’ve been putting off, or go see a movie. Give your mind something else to focus on besides depression. Admittedly, I struggle with distracting myself because I have yet to find a hobby I can continuously enjoy and practice. I usually turn to cleaning or movement.

Deny: Deny those negative or anxious thoughts. Do not allow them to consume you. Remember that not all thoughts are true thoughts. Don’t allow yourself to believe the thoughts that scare you, depress you, or worry you. It can be hard, but it is important to gently, but firmly, deny the thoughts that distress you. This one is something that took me a while to successfully practice and I still struggle with denying my negative thoughts today. But, when I do it, it helps me feel like I’ve made a little space for myself in my mind that wasn’t previously there.

Deal: Deal with the thoughts you’re having or with the circumstances that are inducing or worsening your depression. Acknowledge the things that distress you, worry you, or scare you. Do not believe them but do not ignore or suppress them either. Ignoring and suppressing your scary and negative thoughts make them bigger monsters than they deserve to be. It is exhausting to constantly try to run from your own mind. By dealing with your thoughts, you can stop making an enemy of your own mind and take some power away from your negative thoughts.

Disengage/Disconnect: To the best of your ability, Disengage and disconnect from situations that depress and distress you. Disengage from social media and disconnect from technology. Stop doomscrolling or numbing your mind with TikToks and Reels and put down your phone. Step away from conversations and situations that you notice are not helping you but instead are worsening your mental health and affecting your mood. I deleted all of my social media years ago and have not looked back. I am still working on consistently removing myself from situations that have more of a negative impact than a positive one but I’m getting there.

Dine: Hunger and thirst have never made any situation better and this is especially true for depression. Depression does not only happen in the mind but in the body as well. If you’re not physically at your best, then your mind won’t be operating in peak condition. When I’m in a particularly low mood, I forget to or neglect to eat which makes me feel so much worse than I need to. Make sure to dine consistently and intentionally as healthily as you can manage.

Dump: Dump all of your thoughts onto a page, rant in a voice memo, or talk to yourself in the shower. Get the emotions out of your head and bring them into the real world. This is perhaps the most cathartic of all the advice I have. My head feels less full after I’ve offloaded some of my thoughts somewhere else. I feel lighter after I journal but it is hard for me to consistently reach for my diary and pen when I’m feeling down.

Distance: Move! Put some distance between yourself and your depression. If you have been in your room all day feeling crummy then move to the kitchen. If you’ve been sitting in the house all day feeling down then take a walk outside. The movement can be as small or big as you want it to be. On down days, escaping from my room and just standing in the backyard for a couple of minutes can make me feel better.

Declutter: I firmly believe that one’s surroundings is a reflection of their mind. When I’m feeling low, my room and car often reflect my mind’s turmoil. Cleaning and organizing makes me feel better. A clean space can work wonders for the mind. Declutter and clean your space when you’re not feeling your best. Cleaning is not only a great distraction, but a form of exercise and a great way to maintain personal hygiene. Cleaning also encourages you to take on other tasks once you have a clear space to do them in.

Here are some other things that’ve helped me that didn’t make the main list because I couldn’t figure out how to turn them into words that started with D.

Sleep: Depression is exhausting. Naps about 30 minutes or less before 3 p.m. can help give you a little break from the world and provide you with the energy you need to face the rest of the day. Also, it is important to have a good sleep schedule. Try to sleep through the night, avoid distractions, like your phone, in bed, and work on getting fulfilling, restful sleep. I am a terrible sleeper and it definitely contributes to my mood throughout the day.

Self-care: Skipping showers is one of my warning signs that I am entering a depressed state. It is hard to take care of yourself when your mind has turned against you. However, a good shower always makes me feel better. Practicing self-care is a great way to show yourself that you are worth pampering. Self-care does not only apply to hygiene but can extend to other things such as massages, exercise, meditation, getting help when you need it, and more.

Cry: Sometimes, you just need a good cry. Crying is cathartic. Cry when you need to. It’s okay. It’s normal. Let it out.